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Christian perspective on hookup after divorce

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In the 19 years that I have been alive, the topic of sexual intercourse has never been discussed in my family. I write this article now for two reasons. Thus, the purpose of this article is to clear up some misconceptions about the Christian perspective on sex—from someone who has been on both sides. There is no shame in the concept. Song of Solomon, for example, is "Christian perspective on hookup after divorce" entire book of the Bible dedicated to the passionate love between King Solomon and his bride.

The imagery provided is unmistakable: He brought me to the banqueting house, and his banner over me was love. This entire book clearly demonstrates that sex is a pure and holy expression of love—by no means a sin. It is taking lightly and treating inappropriately what is sacred and intimate.

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Christianity respects sex as the culmination of a holy covenant between two people in the context of marriage, where they become unified as one. Christians uphold sex with dignity and respect, because they believe that it is more than just a physical act. Ultimately, sex deserves respect and should not be taken lightly as simply a pleasurable pastime or bucket-list experience.

This idea is not prudish—it is respectful. Now, what makes sex a contentious topic is when it is placed outside of the context of boundaries and marriage—sounds conservative and antiquated, I know. In order to address the need for boundaries, it is important to first look at what happens when boundaries are not in place.

We Christian perspective on hookup after divorce all seen or heard it before.

From cheating and adultery to rape and molestation, sexual wrongdoing is the root of much hurt and suffering in the world. In some cases, friendships are lost and trauma is caused as boundaries are crossed.

Closer to home, we see the damage done by sexual wrongdoing as we look to the recent scandals on the UC Berkeley campus. Sexual misbehavior has a way of ruining lives and relationships in a way that other misconducts do not.

Indeed, when that which is more precious and intimate becomes twisted, it can then become the worst. Further, we need boundaries because all good things need boundaries.

The repercussions of lack of boundaries clearly demonstrate this. Therefore, what exactly is the boundary for sex? Do not engage in sexual activity outside of marriage. If we were all just bags of flesh walking around on earth, our only purpose to live long enough to reproduce and then die, then perhaps casual sex outside of marriage would be understandable and even justified.

However, we are not just physical beings; we are so much more. Marriage is the intended Christian perspective on hookup after divorce for sex because marriage was always supposed to be lifelong, binding, exclusive, precious, and constant—regardless of changing feelings and circumstances.

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While this article is not arguing the sanctity of marriage or the biblical defense of the institution, Christian thought on sex cannot be without discussion of marriage.

Thus, I will continue to briefly discuss it. Sex outside of marriage is adultery. And from American Beauty to The Scarlet Letteradultery is a topic that has both intrigued and terrified a wide range of audiences.

When taken outside of this Christian perspective on hookup after divorce, sex is adultery. Lewis concisely sums up the Christian view of extramarital sex: More blatantly, the crucial reason why marriage is essential to sexual activity can be found in Genesis 2.

Thus, as in hookup culture, when there is only bonding in the flesh but no bonding in marriage, people are then subscribing themselves to bonding and tearing apart again and again. Nowadays, hookup culture may be the norm. Yet it was never meant to be that way. God sets boundaries for us because He loves us. He tells us that our bodies are holy temples, and He himself dwells Christian perspective on hookup after divorce us. As 1 Corinthians 6: You are not your own, for you were bought with a price.

So glorify God in your body. There is nothing holy or beautiful about detachedly sleeping around. Christianity values marriage because the idea is that marriage is for life. Lastly, while we were created as sexual beings, we were not created as solely sexual beings.

Ultimately, we are more than fleshly creatures desiring to procreate. God created bodies with sex organs, but He also created minds and hearts to pursue love and righteousness. The focus of our lives should be something much greater, something much more meaningful and fulfilling.

That is, as Christians, we are called to refrain from engaging in sexual activity until marriage, so that we may not be consumed by our desire for fleshly passion.

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Yet eventually, I started to wonder in which case objectification was happening more: I have now learned that the boundaries that God has placed in my life are good. There was a period in my life when I wanted to push against them, thinking that I was shackled. Truly, I have discovered that God really is not trying to deprive us by pleading that we refrain from pursuing sexual desires.

God is not Christian perspective on hookup after divorce evil, patriarchal judge who only wants to guilt-trip us into upholding Victorian ideals. God is a loving Father who cares deeply about our well-being—not just physical, but also our mental, spiritual, and emotional well-being.

He cares for all of his children, and it causes Him deep grief when He Christian perspective on hookup after divorce us sharing our bodies in any context short of a lifelong promise. All this being said, I know that a lot of us, Christians and non-Christians alike, may already have struggled with sexual desire and perhaps even experienced the consequences of it.

I do hope, however, that if you are struggling against something that you feel is wrong, you may voice and address it. He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our Christian perspective on hookup after divorce. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.

There is so much more to this topic and so much more that I wish to say than can be written in one article. Nevertheless, I hope that my words can lead to fruitful discussions and deeper understanding between both Christians and non-Christians. Above all, I pray that we may all seek truth and maturity in wisdom. Lewis, Mere Christianity C. Bethel took her name from Genesis She enjoys ice cream much more than coffee, and talks way too fast in real life.

She loves questions and discussions, and would be very happy to engage in dialogue with readers via email at: Finally, she wants to thank readers for their open minds and hearts, and is overjoyed that they picked up this journal and read through the articles. On the Dignity of Sex. You might also be interested in: Despite how common it is, I had a hard time finding much research done on divorcing and divorced couples getting that final hook up.

There's a lot out there. “That's a little promise I made between me and God. After the divorce I bought this ring in a junk shop, and told God that I wouldn't take it off until. Premarital sex, postmarital sex (after death or divorce) are prohibited. We trample on the beautiful grace Christ has won for us. When we hook up and falsely believe Jesus is casually okay with it, to put it bluntly, we are not.

It was surprising to locate out that a parentage friend who attended church revealed that she and her shush believed in an unspoken for marriage. She said that according to John 3: This was a startle because that is a no-no in the Christian world, right? But so was the Ashley Madison website, which made waves through the Christian community.

You capacity recall them, they encouraged people to have an affair as it would enrich the relationship. There were believers who and visited the hookup plot. Not all Christians are on scantling with that belief, but, and say thank you goodness. Object of those who support unconcluded relationships, put off fastened. Here are 6 principles to consider if you paucity to possess intimacy most of your marriage.

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In the 19 years that I have been alive, the topic of sexual intercourse has never been discussed in my family. Sexual misbehavior has a way of ruining lives and relationships in a way that other misconducts do not. He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. Thus, I will continue to briefly discuss it. Lewis, Mere Christianity C. You might also be interested in: Thus, as in hookup culture, when there is only bonding in the flesh but no bonding in marriage, people are then subscribing themselves to bonding and tearing apart again and again.

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